Focus for a moment on the internal commentary you have with yourself almost every waking minute. Our inner observations include both resourceful and unresourceful things we say and do to ourselves. This self-talk – this dialogue that happens within us – goes on all the time. It enters our subconscious and embeds itself there, and in the double helix as well. The subconscious rules 90 to 96 percent of our decisions!

Usually we engage in self-talk for one of three reasons:

  •  to control our actions or thoughts
  •  to inform ourselves
  •  to judge the actions and beliefs of ourselves or others

Self-talk is what we say to ourselves when things just don’t go right. And on the flip side, it’s what we say to ourselves when we’ve achieved a long awaited goal. We talk to ourselves about our successes and about what we need to do. And we talk to ourselves when someone is critical about our work, or when something in our world is negative.

We have about 60,000 thoughts each day. Our thoughts emerge out of energy patterns set as a response to the events in our lives. The inner dialogue that emerges is shaped by the voices of those in our past, and mingled with the vast tapestry of external influences. We then filter and comment, in line with supporting our beliefs and values.

If you’re not achieving and/or enjoying success in all the areas of your wheel of life – in relationships, your work, your studies, or any other area of your life – something you’re saying to yourself about your achievements and your capacity to achieve is likely reinforcing a pattern of self-sabotage. The mind is an incredibly powerful magnet, and it draws to you whatever corresponds to its ruling state. By developing strategies for self-talk, like the power of positive thought, you can literally turn your life around for the better.

7  Steps to a Positive Self-Talk Strategy:

1.  Awareness: Notice the negative self-talk, and stop it. Literally say “Stop” out loud!

Tip: Journaling is really useful for processing sabotaging self-talk and gaining an understanding of the layers of history and meaning.

2.  Accept the fact of your self-talk with curiosity and respect.

3.  Reconsider any assumptions that come from your self-talk.

4.  Reframe your self-talk with neutralising or positive vocabulary.

5.  Teach yourself to see events as signs of more good to come.

6.  Frame experiences as evidence that fabulous things will happen in other areas of your life.

7.  Learn to define positive occurrences as results of your own actions and the positive qualities that you have, and you’re well on your way to becoming an optimist!

An optimist is defined by the art of positive self-talk – by how you describe events to yourself and the explanatory style you use. Optimists are healthier, achieve more, perform better, persist, live longer, take more risks, believe in themselves, and enjoy a more positive experience of life.

There are some amazing statistics about the power of the challenging things people have done or said. We only remember five percent, if that, of the positives, the compliments, the magnificent things that people share with us, as opposed to the 95 percent that sticks from the down side – the negative. So you’re walking into a mire when dealing with the little gremlin that is your self-talk saboteur. That saboteur is feeding off the 95 percent of negative stuff that really sticks and stays in your mind.

You can get different results when you change your thoughts, and if you change your thoughts, you’ll change your actions. If you can change your actions, you’ll absolutely change your results.

There is a thought in your mind right now, and the longer you hold on to it, the more you dwell on it, and the more you give life to that thought, the more real it will become. So make sure that thought is an absolutely great one!

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